Wednesday, March 9, 2011

No Problem, I've Got Just The Thing

So, Monday got a little crazy. The afternoon especially. After dinner, which with 7 kids at the table, got a little wild, Blair got up and said he was going to the store. "You wanna go?" he asks. "You look like you might need to get out of here for a bit."

I know exactly what that looks like...eyebrows frozen in the 'up' position, clothes spotted and askew, one sock on (the other one wiped up a spill in the kitchen accidently. I meant to go get another pair, but it was so busy!) hair standing up, mascara under get the picture. You have probably even *been* the picture.

So, I brushed my hair, changed my shirt, wiped the mascara off from under and applied some to my actual eyelashes. And we left. We went to the grocery and bought milk. When we were back in the Jeep (the Jeep is Blair's actual sweetheart, someday I'll tell you a story about it) he said, "We should do something else, that didn't take very long and you sounded done back there."

We determined we would go to the furniture store.  I love the furniture store. Really love it. Not that it's such a nice store, or cheap store or anything like that. It's so Clean. And New.  In this store are miles and miles of nice furniture. It's all clean, the cushions are all right where they are supposed to be and there are no boogers on anything. The coffee tables, called 'occasional tables' where I live, all have things on them that do not include the book Green Eggs and Ham, half eaten crackers, or chocolate milk dots. The truth is, I couldn't actually *identify* half the crap on those tables...dried, fuzzy, pointy, multicolored crap-ola. There was a book, but it was fake.

The drawback to this store is the salesmen. They are determined little people. Impossible to unload. So I usually make them work. Today's guy is named Mark. He asks what we are looking for. I am truthful, "Well, Mark, we're not ready to buy today, but we are starting the search for the perfect couch." (What Mark doesn't know is that it took Blair and I two years to find the last couch we could agree on and we've stuck by that couch for the last 12 years.) Mark asks, "What kind of couch?" I answer, truthfully, "The kind that doesn't care that it's been barfed on, and then doesn't tell everyone afterwards." He laughs. Good for him. He asks how many kids we have, and I explain that we have a few kids and some daycare and he starts in with the whole, 'I-could-never-do-that-but-you-must-be-a-saint' speech. I get that a lot. I also understand that lots of people aren't cut out for daycare, but I can tell you, not many of us are cut out for sales....or teaching....or sitting at a desk searching for dead people (hi Debbie!)....or doing a lot of what we each do. I mean, seriously, except for the money, who wants to sit around staring a guts all day? (surgeons) or sick and naked people (more doctors) or arguing and dealing with paper and crap all day ( lawyers) I do my job because I like it, and it may be the only thing besides talking and writing I can stand to do for any length of time:)

You see, this is why it takes me so long to say anything, I get sidetracked...

Mark the sales-guy starts taking us around the store showing us great couches. He really was a good couch salesman in that he knew what he was talking about (I have seen a lot of couches and had a few of them apart and I know about couches, too) and he was actually showing us stuff we could afford. That was where Mark won me over as a salesperson. Usually, I am let to the most expensive stuff, or the stuff they are trying to unload or if it's the end of the month, the exact couch who's commission will just meet the sales goal. This is how to tell: The sales guy shows you a thing and you act interested. Look around and pick something just $100 dollars less. If he's still good, go down again. Pretty soon, he will start leading you back up, and when he does, the piece he takes you to is the one:) If you are planning to buy, be nice and get this one, or one better:) I like to help them out, when I can.

I cannot help Mark today. I am not ready for a new couch in my house and while I am thinking about it, I am very picky about the couch and it is a lot of money and I don't want to have to stare at an $800 thing I can't stand in my very own living room. Mark give us his card, and we say goodnight. I am ready to go home.

By the way, the best time to visit the furniture store if you want a salesman is Monday night. That store was deserted. The best time to visit if you don't is Saturday afternoon, they are too busy to care about you:)


Asim Shahzad said...

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lymalu73 said...

Those salemsan can drive you crazy. But someday you will find that couch.